# Catriona Standingford Counsellor Therapist

> Counselling and Therapy | Catriona Standingford | Online and In-Person


## Posts

- [Guilt After Cutting Off Parents: Why It Happens & What Helps](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/guilt-after-cutting-off-parents/): Feeling guilt after cutting off parents doesn't necessarily mean you made the wrong decision. A counsellor explains where the guilt comes from, how it gets tangled up with grief, and ways to cope with it on the hard days.
- [Should I Reconcile With My Estranged Family Member?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/should-i-reconcile-with-estranged-family-member/): Whether to reconcile with an estranged family member rarely has a single right answer. Here I share the questions that can help you think it through, the signs it may or may not be the right time, and why it's okay not to decide yet.
- [Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/sibling-estrangement/): Sibling estrangement can be just as painful as any other family loss, yet it's often treated as a minor falling-out. Here I look at why sibling relationships break down in adulthood, how it differs from parent-child estrangement, and what can help you cope.
- [Therapy for Family Estrangement: What It Actually Looks Like](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/therapy-for-family-estrangement/): Therapy for family estrangement isn't about taking sides or pushing you to reconcile. Here's what it can look like in practice, from the first session to the grief, guilt and decisions we work through together, and how you'll know it's helping.
- [My Adult Child Has Cut Off Contact With Me, and I Don't Know Why](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/my-adult-child-has-cut-off-contact-with-me-and-i-dont-know-why/): There can be a particular kind of silence that follows an adult child cutting off contact, and it isn't like other silences. It isn't just the absence of phone calls or messages or the small, ordinary noise of someone being in your life. It's the absence of an explanation. 
- [Coming Out as Transgender, and Losing People For It (And What Might Help)](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/coming-out-as-transgender-and-losing-people-for-it-and-what-might-help/): Coming out as trans can be very hard.  Planning when, planning where, planning how.  Repeating what you’re going to say over and over in your heard, or perhaps writing the sixth draft of an email you are going to send.  For some, a harder part can be what happens next, when someone you love goes quiet, tells you you are wrong about yourself or decides you’re not someone they want to know anymore.
- [Emotional Abuse Can Be Just as Dangerous as Physical Abuse](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/emotional-abuse-can-be-just-as-dangerous-as-physical-abuse/): When people talk about abuse, most imagine a black eye, bruising on the body, broken bones and other visible injuries.  If you can’t see it, surely it can’t be that bad.  But not all abuse is physical.  Emotional abuse leaves no marks on the skin.  There are no bruises that you can show as evidence of the abuse.  But emotional abuse is just as dangerous as physical abuse, just as damaging, and just as life altering.  Whether it occurred in childhood, or as an adult with the perpetrator being a partner, a sibling, a parent or someone else, for many survivors the wounds of emotional abuse last far longer than any physical injury ever could.
- [Hours' Notice, Years of Hope: The Welsh Gender Service and Mental Health](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/hours-notice-years-of-hope-the-welsh-gender-service-and-mental-health/): I’ve been sitting with this story for a few days now – NHS Wales cancelling every gender-affirming surgery for Welsh Gender Service patients with no notice -and I keep coming back to the fact that some people found out surgery was cancelled just hours before they were due to go into theatre (QueerAF) .  This weighs on my mind, not because of the politics of it, but what this does to a person’s mental health when they have been preparing for surgery both mentally and physically for years, and then the rug is abruptly pulled out from under them.  Should this be the level of care given to trans patients?
- [Workplace Burnout and Stress - Why So Many People Are Struggling in Silence](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/workplace-burnout-and-stress-why-so-many-people-are-struggling-in-silence/): Workplace burnout is becoming one of the most significant wellbeing challenges facing employees today. Despite this, it remains something people rarely feel able to admit. Research from the British Association for Counselling and Psychotherapy’s ‘Public Perceptions Survey‘ reports that nearly 1 in 5 people suffer from work-related burnout.  Look around your office – 1 in 5 - Does that surprise you?  Might you be one of them?
- [Why Do Adult Children Cut Off Their Parents?  A Therapist's Guide to Understanding Estrangement](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/why-do-adult-children-cut-off-their-parents/): Family estrangement is rarely about a single blow-up event or one bad phone call. In most cases it's the result of a long pattern — unresolved harm, boundaries that were never respected, or a fundamental gap in values that could not be bridged. It's also almost never a spur-of-the-moment decision. As a counsellor and therapist who works with both estranged adult children and the parents trying to understand what happened, I see how much thought and heart-wrenching deliberation usually sits behind a decision to go no contact — and how much pain sits on both sides of it.
- [Should I Go 'No Contact' With A Family Member?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/family-estrangement-no-contact/): If you’ve ever found yourself wondering if you’d be better off without a family member in your life, whether a parent, a child or a sibling, it’s likely that you have been carrying a level of pain, confusion, or exhaustion that has built up over years.  
- [What is Trauma?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/what-is-trauma/): Many people imagine trauma as something dramatic or catastrophic, but trauma can come from a wide range of experiences. It can be sudden, like an accident or assault. It can be ongoing, like emotional neglect, coercive control, or chronic stress. It can be subtle, like growing up in an environment where your needs were dismissed or your identity was not accepted. 
- [Gender Identity - Exploring Who You Are](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/gender-identity-exploring-who-you-are/): Exploring gender identity isn’t a test or a box ticking exercise.  It’s a process of listening to yourself and discovering what feels true for you. For many, gender is not simply “male” or “female” but a rich, layered experience.  It’s not about becoming someone new, but about becoming more yourself.
- [Why Does My Family Treat Me Differently?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/why-does-my-family-treat-me-differently/): Many people feel like the odd one out in their family — the one who gets blamed, overlooked, criticised, or expected to hold everything together. Feeling singled out can be painful and confusing, especially when you can’t pinpoint what you’ve done “wrong”. In reality, being treated differently usually says more about what is going on in the family system rather than what what it says about you.
- [Why Do I Stay in Toxic Relationships?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/why-do-i-stay-in-toxic-relationships/): Many of us stay in relationships that make us feel hurt and confused, that are painful and emotionally draining.  It’s not because we want to suffer, but because there are powerful psychological and nervous system forces that make leaving incredibly difficult. This doesn’t mean we are stuck.  It means we can make sense of this and take the steps needed to leave.

## Pages

- [Podcasts](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/podcast-coming-soon/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Thank you for subscribing](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/thank-you-for-subscribing/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Digital Policy](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/digital-policy/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Privacy Notice](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/privacy-notice/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Terms and Conditions](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/terms-and-conditions/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Newsletter](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/newsletter/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Unsure?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/unsure-help-therapy-counselling/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Life & Death](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/life-death-therapy-counselling/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [LGBTQIA+ Community](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/lgbtqia-gsrd-gender-sex-relationships-therapy-counselling/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Family](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/family-therapy-counselling/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Abuse & Violence : Abused, controlled, violated, assaulted or hurt?](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/abuse-violence-therapy-counselling/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Trauma Therapy](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/trauma-therapy-counselling/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Contact](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/contact/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Frequently Asked Questions](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/faqs/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Blog](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/blog/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [About](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/about-catriona-standingford/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]
- [Home](https://catrionastandingford.co.uk/): Sibling Estrangement: Why It Happens and How to Cope By Catriona Standingford MBACP, MNCPS (Acc.) Sibling estrangement is when brothers or sisters stop speaking, or keep only minimal contact, as adults. It often gets less attention than parent-child estrangement, but it can be just as painful, and in some ways harder to explain to others. Here I look at why it happens, how it differs, and what can help. Key points Sibling estrangement is common, and it can be just as painful as any other family estrangement. It often grows out of childhood roles, parental favouritism, caring for ageing parents, inheritance […]

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